Sunday, November 12, 2006

A Message from Our Sponsor

Example

Tired of tripping over text? Weary of picking up your kid's carelessly strewn fonts? Have type tangled in the shag rug? Suffer no more, home owners! Introducing Hovertype™, Fakiegrind's answer to scriptorial spillage, textual untidiness and lexicographical clutter in general. Thrill to clear, bold type hovering before your very eyes in your own living room, dining room, kitchen, den and bedroom. No ropes, adhesives, braces, latticework, scaffolding or strings attached. Hovertype simply floats in your bathroom, garage, office, car or library. Whether you have something specific to impart to friends, family members, neighbours, coworkers or passersby; or whether you just like the look of a large bold-faced "MESSOMORPH" or "HYACINTH" greeting you in the front hall, depend on Hovertype™ to meet all your free-standing text suspension needs. Available from the Fakiegrind online catalogue, Item # 445-0001. No salesperson or semiotician will call. Defects of a grammatical nature not covered under warranty.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...


No scaffolding required?

I'm not quite sure what you're selling...

You're not selling the baby are you?

Cuz I will buy the baby.

jin said...

I want my money back!
I put up the words
Molasses Cookies
& some of the letters fell down!

:-(
Now people think I sell
@ss Cookies.

This is NOT a good thing.

Grammar Slammer said...

"@ss cookies"?

Grammar Slammer!!!

Gyrobo said...

I'll take 45 orders, or ten gross, depending on the font family. We robots only deal with sans-serif for historical reasons.