Saturday, November 12, 2005

Project: Danceark

Ruination Dance

In view of the rumoured re-appearance of the Endtime Adjuster and the pending utter annihilation of the world as we know it, the Institute of Crazy Endangered Dances, ICED, has commissioned Fakiegrind to build a massive Danceark.

Funded by the money-stuffed disco ball that Gyrobo, Lord of the Frozen Lower Blogosphere, has pledged to send, this immense, multi-level dance floor complex will measure some 20 000 by 88 000 632 cubits, and will have facilities for the preservation of every rhythmic form of moment know to humanity.

Specifically, we are still looking for living practitioners of the following dance traditions:

The Wa-wa
The Sizzlebutt
The Lundy-Hop
The Sidewinder
Reverse Moonwalk
Body Popping
Canuck Twister
Indian Ropeburn
David Byrne Seizure
Boogaloo Waltz
Safety Dance
Spirit of Bizmark
Endtime Polka

If you are proficient with any of these steps, this may be your last chance to secure a place on the Danceark, thereby circumventing The Great Unhinging, in which all retail stores will be closed for an indefinite period of time--even the 24 hour ones.

Also, if you like to move your body but never had the inclination or coordination to learn any actual dance steps, we are still in need of twenty semi-feral souls to fill out the Speed Thrash Perpetual Mosh Pit.

No comments: