Friday, March 16, 2007

Fakiegrind Is Moving

No, we're not re-vamping the blog or changing our web address or anything of that nature. But Fakiegrind Central Headquarters is in the process of moving our extensive collection of top-secret dossiers on hitherto suppressed, revolutionary new skateboard technologies, (not to mention the vast and largely uncatalogued Vaults of Oldness) and our complete battalion of 1940s office furniture and vacuum tube computer systems to a brand new location.

Example
Now's the time to sell, before they turn it all into condos.

So as to better foil the nefarious plots of our numerous enemies and detractors, the exact location and date of the move must be kept strictly hush-hush, and we may have to maintain blog silence for an unspecified length of time, until we can get our systems up and running to normal capacity. Please note that during this period, the Antiballistic Missile Early Warning and Deployment systems will also be down, so please do not launch any ordinance (live or otherwise) our way in a friendly attempt to test our satellite shields (and this goes for you too, Roboshrub Inc.). Also, we don't anticipate having any difficulties when the time comes to move the bio-weapons research lab — Agent Rocksteady's pick-up truck has been specially equipped with an old refrigerator we found curbside the other day — but, just in case, we have advised all readers within a thousand mile radius to make sure they've had their flu shots.

If all goes well, we should be up and running again in a month or so. We're also looking for new homes for the hybrid dog-walrus sentries (the "walrogs"), as our new Headquarters has much less space for our kennel/genetic research facility. Anyone interested in acquiring one of these creatures (who love kids and make for great pets) can drop us a line.

10 comments:

jin said...

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jin said...

(Just in case my humour is shared by none other than myself which is unfortunately all too probable: the previous comment was supposed to replicate me "dropping you a line".)

When can I expect my Walrog to arrive?

Bathroom Hippo said...


Greetings sir,

I run a meat processing plant and would like to purchase several walrogs. Oh...and be on the lookout for the new McWalrog burger!

Andrew said...

Yeah Fakie G, send me some walrogs.

Gyrobo said...

The McWalrog was a secret family recipe! How did you vandals get at it?!

Was it the dog?!

flatlander said...

Wow! I never expect walrogs to become such a hot commodity. Walrog stock is up 15 points on the Bolivian stock exchange (and climbing) !

Friends of Fakiegrind: your home walrog processing kits are in the mail, and some live specimines should be arriving just as soon as we can, er, sneak them through customs.

The little hitch is, they're slightly radioactive -but then again, so are bananas....

Thanks for dropping by with your lines and such!

Anonymous said...

hey mistymint
um hope you like yer new digs

flatlander said...

Mistymint? How mistifying!

Must have confused me with some other flavour...

The Taker of Gist said...

Just be certain to shut the lights off, lest the voles make their new home in your fusebox.

jin said...

I feel uber privileged.

I received my Walrog in the mail the other day.
Thanks Fakiegrind for the free instruction manual you enclosed!!!