A man died and went to heaven. As he stood in front of St. Peter at the Pearly Gates, he saw a huge wall of clocks behind him. He asked, "What are all those clocks?"
St. Peter answered, "Those are Lie-Clocks. Everyone on Earth has a Lie-Clock. Every time you lie, the hands on your clock will move."
"Oh," said the man, "whose clock is that one?" "That's Mother Teresa's. The hands have never moved, indicating that she's never told a lie."
"Incredible," said the man, "and whose clock is that one?" St. Peter responded, "That's Abraham Lincoln's clock. The hands have moved twice, telling us that old Abe only told two lies in his entire life."
"Well," said the man, "where's Paul Martin's or Jean Chretien's clock?"
"They're in Jesus' office. He's using them as ceiling fans."
--Thanks to G.P.H. for sending this one over the wire!